Introduction

It’s one of the oddest things about humans: the more we care, the harder we try in ineffective ways. Situations often unlock themselves the moment we relax, yet we go through countless iterations of that and still don’t adopt relaxing into something as the norm.

This verse utilizes a form of logic that’s getting more familiar: for something to be true, so must its opposite be.

In this case, some fascinating psycho-spiritual truths are laid out for us. Combined, they point us to the timeless realization that “yielding is superior to coercion.” When said out loud, it’s kind of a “duh” moment. However, we tend to forget that at the most critical points of our lives.

I felt my Zen teacher shouting throughout the commentary, so I’d be remiss if I failed to mention that much of the language here echoes what Jun Po taught me: eternal gratitude, JP.

Translation

Spread things out first
to facilitate bringing them together.

Strengthening
enables softening.

To abandon something
you have to join with it first.

Give it away lovingly
so that you can take it.

This is called “veiled wisdom.”
Yielding is superior to coercion.

Fish can’t leave the water.
A nation’s best tools
can’t be shown to others.

Commentary

Spread things out first
to facilitate bringing them together.

To collect yourself can only mean that your “self” is dispersed. You must first exhale to inhale life and vibrancy into your system. To focus on something, you must have previously spread out your vision.

We will revisit this position several more times to drive the point home. However, this one line says it all. There can be no contraction without expansion. Movement is only possible where there is distance between the extremes. Whichever state you’re looking for, you were already in it previously. All we’re doing is remembering and returning to what some part of us already knows.

Returning to the specific practicalities of this stanza, the instructions to “spread out” before “bringing together” are critical to the majority of meditative and embodiment techniques. Relaxing, or “warming up,” at the beginning of a period of focused action is a well-established best practice across the board.

Strengthening
enables softening.

These two lines speak to me on two levels: physical fitness and ego.

Flexibility and strength go hand in hand. Weak muscles cannot become flexible because their opposing muscle creates a persistent state of over-extension. Likewise, weak muscles cannot apply sufficient force, and the opposing muscle is in a persistent state of contraction. My work as a personal trainer drove this home as clients realized the best results when we included exercises targeting muscle systems opposite the problem area. For example, I treated my clients’ back pain better by developing core and quad strength first, then adding back and hamstring flexibility exercises. Since our relationship with our body is critical to Weaving the Way, it makes sense that there’s a pointer in this direction.

Perhaps even more profound is this truth’s parallel in our ego systems. It takes a healthy and well-balanced ego not to take itself too seriously. Our most reactive and forceful moments usually result from our deepest insecurities. For Weavers of the Way who seek self-authorship, those unexamined shadows and insecure recesses of the mind must become treasures to shine light on. For those set on self-transcendence, this process is even more essential.

To abandon something
you have to join with it first.

Stepping further into the seeming paradox, we discuss abandoning something by joining with it. This process has broad applicability but fits nicely with exploring shadow, insecurity, and self-authorship. Shadow work is exploring the unconscious parts of ourselves, such as repressed emotions or behaviors, to understand ourselves and our relationships better.

We can’t leave somewhere we’ve never been. We can’t heal a wound we refuse to acknowledge. We can’t strengthen a muscle we refuse to use. Doing this is often contrary to our instincts because our instincts tell us discomfort should be avoided. The fact remains that nothing hurtful or painful can be resolved until it is dealt with, and dealing with a situation often means “getting into it” for a while.

I’ve found integral theory’s 3-2-1 principle very helpful in shadow work, and it happens to align with this principle.

Give it away lovingly
so that you can take it.

This statement’s implications are far-reaching and worthy of deep contemplation beyond the brief commentary offered here, which is always the case. Nonetheless!

Giving something away lovingly so you can take it back forcefully makes no sense in the context of the values espoused by this text or in the realm of normal human relations. However, when reading through the lens of meditation instructions, it gets clearer.

This feels like the instructions given and practiced for directly experiencing the Dao. In many esoteric and mystical contexts, the practice centers around building up a clear understanding and loving, determined thirst for union so that we “give ourselves away” to the experience.

Paramahansa Yogananda was all about this in his system of yogic meditation. Zen and Sufism both rely on an unwavering devotion and commitment to surrendering to Buddha Nature/God. Catholic mysticism likewise breaks open our hearts with compassionate devotion to the suffering of Christ, so our hearts rip open to receiving the gift of the holy spirit. It goes on and on.

Once that direct experience happens, we must “take our seat” in this realization. Integrating this deeper truth cannot be given to us by anyone else. Only we can know that we have received this gift, and only we can do the work to become living expressions of this truth.

This is called “veiled wisdom.”
Yielding is superior to coercion.

Bringing this counter-intuitive “veiled wisdom” into a one-liner, the text says, “yielding is superior to coercion.” When we look back at the verse, we see a pattern of process. We start in one place and know we must get to another. Most of us jump straight in, trying to make the result happen, regardless of our starting point or the dynamics involved. We just want to get it done and have it over with. We end up trying too hard in the wrong ways and causing all sorts of problems for ourselves.

Instead, the text tells us that weavers of the way embrace the reality that they are inhabiting. Through that embrace, they can sense the action needed to harmonize the situation most effectively. That action is almost always an internal cognitive/emotional adjustment to the circumstances of our life, adjustments based on respecting the truth of the dynamic interplay of life unfolding through the harmonization of opposing forces.

Fish can’t leave the water.

If this seems daunting, the text reminds us that it describes how it always works anyway. We need only stop fighting the natural flow of life and embrace being “fish in the water.”

A nation’s best tools
can’t be shown to others.

Recall that a “nation” is a collection of experiences functioning as an ego identity in the esoteric language of Weaving the Way. Here, as in the previous verse, we are reminded that only our personal experience can reveal the truth of these statements. Assuming these commentaries are effective at conveying helpful information, they are, by themselves, utterly useless trash. Only when people practice Weaving the Way can they get better at it. Only our internalized skills are relevant to our lives. What we see in others that we idolize or attempt to model ourselves after is only the barest surface of the tools they employ to live that way.

In short, no one can do this for you.